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from the horse…country； and every day he saw the Lunatics； horse…mad；
betting…mad； drunken…mad； vice…mad； and the designing Keepers always
after them。 The idea pervaded； like the second colour in shot…silk； the
whole of Mr。 Goodchild's impressions。 They were much as follows：
Monday； mid…day。 Races not to begin until to…morrow； but all the
mob…Lunatics out； crowding the pavements of the one main street of pretty
and pleasant Doncaster； crowding the road； particularly crowding the
outside of the Betting Rooms； whooping and shouting loudly after all
passing vehicles。 Frightened lunatic horses occasionally running away；
with infinite clatter。 All degrees of men； from peers to paupers； betting
incessantly。 Keepers very watchful； and taking all good chances。 An
awful family likeness among the Keepers； to Mr。 Palmer and Mr。 Thurtell。
With some knowledge of expression and some acquaintance with heads
（thus writes Mr。 Goodchild）； I never have seen anywhere； so many
repetitions of one class of countenance and one character of head （both
evil） as in this street at this time。 Cunning； covetousness； secrecy； cold
calculation； hard callousness and dire insensibility； are the uniform Keeper
characteristics。 Mr。 Palmer passes me five times in five minutes； and； so
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THE LAZY TOUR OF TWO IDLE APPRENTICES
I go down the street； the back of Mr。 Thurtell's skull is always going on
before me。
Monday evening。 Town lighted up； more Lunatics out than ever； a
complete choke and stoppage of the thoroughfare outside the Betting
Rooms。 Keepers； having dined； pervade the Betting Rooms； and sharply
snap at the moneyed Lunatics。 Some Keepers flushed with drink； and
some not； but all close and calculating。 A vague echoing roar of 't'harses'
and 't'races' always rising in the air； until midnight； at about which period
it dies away in occasional drunken songs and straggling yells。 But； all
night； some unmannerly drinking…house in the neighbourhood opens its
mouth at intervals and spits out a man too drunk to be retained： who
thereupon makes what uproarious protest may be left in him； and either
falls asleep where he tumbles； or is carried off in custody。
Tuesday morning； at daybreak。 A sudden rising； as it were out of the
earth； of all the obscene creatures； who sell 'correct cards of the races。'
They may have been coiled in corners； or sleeping on door…steps； and；
having all passed the night under the same set of circumstances； may all
want to circulate their blood at the same time； but； however that may be；
they spring into existence all at once and together； as though a new
Cadmus had sown a race…horse's teeth。 There is nobody up； to buy the
cards； but； the cards are madly cried。 There is no patronage to quarrel for；
but； they madly quarrel and fight。 Conspicuous among these hyaenas； as
breakfast… time discloses； is a fearful creature in the general semblance of
a man： shaken off his next…to…no legs by drink and devilry； bare… headed
and bare…footed； with a great shock of hair like a horrible broom； and
nothing on him but a ragged pair of trousers and a pink glazed…calico coat
… made on him … so very tight that it is as evident that he could never take it
off； as that he never does。 This hideous apparition； inconceivably drunk；
has a terrible power of making a gong…like imitation of the braying of an
ass： which feat requires that he should lay his right jaw in his begrimed
right paw； double himself up； and shake his bray out of himself； with much
staggering on his next…to…no legs； and much twirling of his horrible broom；
as if it were a mop。 From the present minute； when he comes in sight
holding up his cards to the windows； and hoarsely proposing purchase to
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THE LAZY TOUR OF TWO IDLE APPRENTICES
My Lord； Your Excellency； Colonel； the Noble Captain； and Your
Honourable Worship … from the present minute until the Grand Race…Week
is finished； at all hours of the morning； evening； day； and night； shall the
town reverberate； at capricious intervals； to the brays of this frightful
animal the Gong…donkey。
No very great racing to…day； so no very great amount of vehicles：
though there is a good sprinkling； too： from farmers' carts and gigs； to
carriages with post…horses and to fours…in…hand； mostly coming by the
road from York； and passing on straight through the main street to the
Course。 A walk in the wrong direction may be a better thing for Mr。
Goodchild to…day than the Course； so he walks in the wrong direction。
Everybody gone to the races。 Only children in the street。 Grand
Alliance Circus deserted； not one Star…Rider left； omnibus which forms
the Pay…Place； having on separate panels Pay here for the Boxes； Pay here
for the Pit； Pay here for the Gallery； hove down in a corner and locked up；
nobody near the tent but the man on his knees on the grass； who is making
the paper balloons for the Star young gentlemen to jump through to… night。
A pleasant road； pleasantly wooded。 No labourers working in the fields；
all gone 't'races。' The few late wenders of their way 't'races；' who are yet
left driving on the road； stare in amazement at the recluse who is not going
't'races。' Roadside innkeeper has gone 't'races。' Turnpike…man has gone
't'races。' His thrifty wife； washing clothes at the toll…house door； is going
't'races' to…morrow。 Perhaps there may be no one left to take the toll to…
morrow； who knows？ Though assuredly that would be neither turnpike…
like nor Yorkshire…like。 The very wind and dust seem to be hurrying
't'races；' as they briskly pass the only wayfarer on the road。 In the
distance； the Railway Engine； waiting at the town…end； shrieks
despairingly。 Nothing but the difficulty of getting off the Line； restrains
that Engine from going 't'races；' too； it is very clear。
At night； mor