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read my thoughts on my ingenuous face。
〃What you're going for is to save life； not to drown your boat's
crew for nothing；〃 he growled severely in my ear。 But as we shoved
off he leaned over and cried out： 〃It all rests on the power of
your arms； men。 Give way for life！〃
We made a race of it； and I would never have believed that a common
boat's crew of a merchantman could keep up so much determined
fierceness in the regular swing of their stroke。 What our captain
had clearly perceived before we left had become plain to all of us
since。 The issue of our enterprise hung on a hair above that abyss
of waters which will not give up its dead till the Day of Judgment。
It was a race of two ship's boats matched against Death for a prize
of nine men's lives； and Death had a long start。 We saw the crew
of the brig from afar working at the pumps … still pumping on that
wreck； which already had settled so far down that the gentle； low
swell； over which our boats rose and fell easily without a check to
their speed； welling up almost level with her head…rails； plucked
at the ends of broken gear swinging desolately under her naked
bowsprit。
We could not； in all conscience； have picked out a better day for
our regatta had we had the free choice of all the days that ever
dawned upon the lonely struggles and solitary agonies of ships
since the Norse rovers first steered to the westward against the
run of Atlantic waves。 It was a very good race。 At the finish
there was not an oar's length between the first and second boat；
with Death coming in a good third on the top of the very next
smooth swell； for all one knew to the contrary。 The scuppers of
the brig gurgled softly all together when the water rising against
her sides subsided sleepily with a low wash； as if playing about an
immovable rock。 Her bulwarks were gone fore and aft； and one saw
her bare deck low…lying like a raft and swept clean of boats；
spars； houses … of everything except the ringbolts and the heads of
the pumps。 I had one dismal glimpse of it as I braced myself up to
receive upon my breast the last man to leave her； the captain； who
literally let himself fall into my arms。
It had been a weirdly silent rescue … a rescue without a hail；
without a single uttered word； without a gesture or a sign； without
a conscious exchange of glances。 Up to the very last moment those
on board stuck to their pumps； which spouted two clear streams of
water upon their bare feet。 Their brown skin showed through the
rents of their shirts； and the two small bunches of half…naked；
tattered men went on bowing from the waist to each other in their
back…breaking labour； up and down； absorbed； with no time for a
glance over the shoulder at the help that was coming to them。 As
we dashed； unregarded； alongside a voice let out one； only one
hoarse howl of command； and then； just as they stood； without caps；
with the salt drying gray in the wrinkles and folds of their hairy；
haggard faces； blinking stupidly at us their red eyelids； they made
a bolt away from the handles； tottering and jostling against each
other； and positively flung themselves over upon our very heads。
The clatter they made tumbling into the boats had an
extraordinarily destructive effect upon the illusion of tragic
dignity our self…esteem had thrown over the contests of mankind
with the sea。 On that exquisite day of gently breathing peace and
veiled sunshine perished my romantic love to what men's imagination
had proclaimed the most august aspect of Nature。 The cynical
indifference of the sea to the merits of human suffering and
courage； laid bare in this ridiculous； panic…tainted performance
extorted from the dire extremity of nine good and honourable
seamen； revolted me。 I saw the duplicity of the sea's most tender
mood。 It was so because it could not help itself； but the awed
respect of the early days was gone。 I felt ready to smile bitterly
at its enchanting charm and glare viciously at its furies。 In a
moment； before we shoved off； I had looked coolly at the life of my
choice。 Its illusions were gone； but its fascination remained。 I
had become a seaman at last。
We pulled hard for a quarter of an hour； then laid on our oars
waiting for our ship。 She was coming down on us with swelling
sails； looking delicately tall and exquisitely noble through the
mist。 The captain of the brig； who sat in the stern sheets by my
side with his face in his hands； raised his head and began to speak
with a sort of sombre volubility。 They had lost their masts and
sprung a leak in a hurricane； drifted for weeks； always at the
pumps； met more bad weather； the ships they sighted failed to make
them out； the leak gained upon them slowly； and the seas had left
them nothing to make a raft of。 It was very hard to see ship after
ship pass by at a distance； 〃as if everybody had agreed that we
must be left to drown；〃 he added。 But they went on trying to keep
the brig afloat as long as possible； and working the pumps
constantly on insufficient food； mostly raw； till 〃yesterday
evening；〃 he continued monotonously； 〃just as the sun went down；
the men's hearts broke。〃
He made an almost imperceptible pause here； and went on again with
exactly the same intonation：
〃They told me the brig could not be saved； and they thought they
had done enough for themselves。 I said nothing to that。 It was
true。 It was no mutiny。 I had nothing to say to them。 They lay
about aft all night； as still as so many dead men。 I did not lie
down。 I kept a look…out。 When the first light came I saw your
ship at once。 I waited for more light； the breeze began to fail on
my face。 Then I shouted out as loud as I was able； 'Look at that
ship！' but only two men got up very slowly and came to me。 At
first only we three stood alone； for a long time； watching you
coming down to us； and feeling the breeze drop to a calm almost；
but afterwards others； too； rose； one after another； and by…and…by
I had all my crew behind me。 I turned round and said to them that
they could see the ship was coming our way； but in this small
breeze she might come too late after all； unless we turned to and
tried to keep the brig afloat long enough to give you time to save
us all。 I spoke like that to them； and then I gave the command to
man the pumps。〃
He gave the command； and gave the example； too； by going himself to
the handles； but it seems that these men did actually hang back for
a moment； looking at each other dubiously before they followed him。
〃He！ he！ he！〃 He broke out into a most unexpected； imbecile；
pathetic； nervous little giggle。 〃Their hearts were broken so！
They had been played with too long；〃 he explained apol