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they obliged to sit mum…chance； and to be ordered about till they
are the laughing…stock of young and old？ I am a bye…word all over
Chigwell； and I say—and it’s fairer my saying so now； than waiting
till you are dead； and I have got your money—I say； that before
long I shall be driven to break such bounds； and that when I do； it
won’t be me that you’ll have to blame； but your own self； and no
other。’
John Willet was so amazed by the exasperation and boldness of
his hopeful son； that he sat as one bewildered； staring in a
ludicrous manner at the boiler； and endeavouring； but quite
ineffectually； to collect his tardy thoughts； and invent an answer。
The guests； scarcely less disturbed； were equally at a loss； and at
length； with a variety of muttered； half…expressed condolences；
and pieces of advice； rose to depart； being at the same time slightly
muddled with liquor。
The honest locksmith alone addressed a few words of coherent
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and sensible advice to both parties； urging John Willet to
remember that Joe was nearly arrived at man’s estate； and should
not be ruled with too tight a hand； and exhorting Joe himself to
bear with his father’s caprices； and rather endeavour to turn them
aside by temperate remonstrance than by ill…timed rebellion。 This
advice was received as such advice usually is。 On John Willet it
made almost as much impression as on the sign outside the door；
while Joe； who took it in the best part； avowed himself more
obliged than he could well express； but politely intimated his
intention nevertheless of taking his own course uninfluenced by
anybody。
‘You have always been a very good friend to me； Mr Varden；’ he
said； as they stood without； in the porch； and the locksmith was
equipping himself for his journey home； ‘I take it very kind of you
to say all this； but the time’s nearly come when the Maypole and I
must part company。’
‘Roving stones gather no moss； Joe；’ said Gabriel。
‘Nor milestones much；’ replied Joe。 ‘I’m little better than one
here； and see as much of the world。’
‘Then； what would you do； Joe？’ pursued the locksmith；
stroking his chin reflectively。 ‘What could you be？ Where could
you go； you see？’
‘I must trust to chance； Mr Varden。’
‘A bad thing to trust to； Joe。 I don’t like it。 I always tell my girl
when we talk about a husband for her； never to trust to chance；
but to make sure beforehand that she has a good man and true；
and then chance will neither make her nor break her。 What are
you fidgeting about there； Joe？ Nothing gone in the harness； I
hope？’
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‘No no；’ said Joe—finding； however； something very engrossing
to do in the way of strapping and buckling—‘Miss Dolly quite
well？’
‘Hearty； thankye。 She looks pretty enough to be well； and good
too。’
‘She’s always both； sir’—
‘So she is； thank God！’
‘I hope；’ said Joe after some hesitation； ‘that you won’t tell this
story against me—this of my having been beat like the boy they’d
make of me—at all events； till I have met this man again and
settled the account。 It’ll be a better story then。’
‘Why who should I tell it to？’ returned Gabriel。 ‘They know it
here； and I’m not likely to come across anybody else who would
care about it。’
‘That’s true enough；’ said the young fellow with a sigh。 ‘I quite
forgot that。 Yes； that’s true！’
So saying； he raised his face； which was very red；—no doubt
from the exertion of strapping and buckling as aforesaid；—and
giving the reins to the old man； who had by this time taken his
seat； sighed again and bade him good night。
‘Good night！’ cried Gabriel。 ‘Now think better of what we have
just been speaking of； and don’t be rash； there’s a good fellow！ I
have an interest in you； and wouldn’t have you cast yourself away。
Good night！’
Returning his cheery farewell with cordial goodwill； Joe Willet
lingered until the sound of wheels ceased to vibrate in his ears；
and then； shaking his head mournfully； re…entered the house。
Gabriel Varden went his way towards London； thinking of a
great many things； and most of all of flaming terms in which to
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relate his adventure； and so account satisfactorily to Mrs Varden
for visiting the Maypole； despite certain solemn covenants
between himself and that lady。 Thinking begets； not only thought；
but drowsiness occasionally； and the more the locksmith thought；
the more sleepy he became。
A man may be very sober—or at least firmly set upon his legs
on that neutral ground which lies between the confines of perfect
sobriety and slight tipsiness—and yet feel a strong tendency to
mingle up present circumstances with others which have no
manner of connection with them； to confound all consideration of
persons； things； times； and places； and to jumble his disjointed
thoughts together in a kind of mental kaleidoscope； producing
combinations as unexpected as they are transitory。 This was
Gabriel Varden’s state； as； nodding in his dog sleep； and leaving
his horse to pursue a road with which he was well acquainted； he
got over the ground unconsciously； and drew nearer and nearer
home。 He had roused himself once； when the horse stopped until
the turnpike gate was opened； and had cried a lusty ‘good night！’
to the toll…keeper； but then he awoke out of a dream about picking
a lock in the stomach of the Great Mogul； and even when he did
wake； mixed up the turnpike man with his mother…in…law who had