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lay morals-第7章

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ss; this  lantern alternately obscured and shining; to and by which the  individual exists and must order his conduct; is something  special to himself and not common to the race。  His joys  delight; his sorrows wound him; according as THIS is  interested or indifferent in the affair; according as they  arise in an imperial war or in a broil conducted by the  tributary chieftains of the mind。  He may lose all; and THIS  not suffer; he may lose what is materially a trifle; and THIS  leap in his bosom with a cruel pang。  I do not speak of it to  hardened theorists: the living man knows keenly what it is I  mean。

'Perceive at last that thou hast in thee something better and  more divine than the things which cause the various effects;  and; as it were; pull thee by the strings。  What is that now  in thy mind? is it fear; or suspicion; or desire; or anything  of that kind?'  Thus far Marcus Aurelius; in one of the most  notable passages in any book。  Here is a question worthy to  be answered。  What is in thy mind?  What is the utterance of  your inmost self when; in a quiet hour; it can be heard  intelligibly?  It is something beyond the compass of your  thinking; inasmuch as it is yourself; but is it not of a  higher spirit than you had dreamed betweenwhiles; and erect  above all base considerations?  This soul seems hardly  touched with our infirmities; we can find in it certainly no  fear; suspicion; or desire; we are only conscious … and that  as though we read it in the eyes of some one else … of a  great and unqualified readiness。  A readiness to what? to  pass over and look beyond the objects of desire and fear; for  something else。  And this something else? this something  which is apart from desire and fear; to which all the  kingdoms of the world and the immediate death of the body are  alike indifferent and beside the point; and which yet regards  conduct … by what name are we to call it?  It may be the love  of God; or it may be an inherited (and certainly well  concealed) instinct to preserve self and propagate the race;  I am not; for the moment; averse to either theory; but it  will save time to call it righteousness。  By so doing I  intend no subterfuge to beg a question; I am indeed ready;  and more than willing; to accept the rigid consequence; and  lay aside; as far as the treachery of the reason will permit;  all former meanings attached to the word righteousness。  What  is right is that for which a man's central self is ever ready  to sacrifice immediate or distant interests; what is wrong is  what the central self discards or rejects as incompatible  with the fixed design of righteousness。

To make this admission is to lay aside all hope of  definition。  That which is right upon this theory is  intimately dictated to each man by himself; but can never be  rigorously set forth in language; and never; above all;  imposed upon another。  The conscience has; then; a vision  like that of the eyes; which is incommunicable; and for the  most part illuminates none but its possessor。  When many  people perceive the same or any cognate facts; they agree  upon a word as symbol; and hence we have such words as TREE;  STAR; LOVE; HONOUR; or DEATH; hence also we have this word  RIGHT; which; like the others; we all understand; most of us  understand differently; and none can express succinctly  otherwise。  Yet even on the straitest view; we can make some  steps towards comprehension of our own superior thoughts。   For it is an incredible and most bewildering fact that a man;  through life; is on variable terms with himself; he is aware  of tiffs and reconciliations; the intimacy is at times almost  suspended; at times it is renewed again with joy。  As we said  before; his inner self or soul appears to him by successive  revelations; and is frequently obscured。  It is from a study  of these alternations that we can alone hope to discover;  even dimly; what seems right and what seems wrong to this  veiled prophet of ourself。

All that is in the man in the larger sense; what we call  impression as well as what we call intuition; so far as my  argument looks; we must accept。  It is not wrong to desire  food; or exercise; or beautiful surroundings; or the love of  sex; or interest which is the food of the mind。  All these  are craved; all these should be craved; to none of these in  itself does the soul demur; where there comes an undeniable  want; we recognise a demand of nature。  Yet we know that  these natural demands may be superseded; for the demands  which are common to mankind make but a shadowy consideration  in comparison to the demands of the individual soul。  Food is  almost the first prerequisite; and yet a high character will  go without food to the ruin and death of the body rather than  gain it in a manner which the spirit disavows。  Pascal laid  aside mathematics; Origen doctored his body with a knife;  every day some one is thus mortifying his dearest interests  and desires; and; in Christ's words; entering maim into the  Kingdom of Heaven。  This is to supersede the lesser and less  harmonious affections by renunciation; and though by this  ascetic path we may get to heaven; we cannot get thither a  whole and perfect man。  But there is another way; to  supersede them by reconciliation; in which the soul and all  the faculties and senses pursue a common route and share in  one desire。  Thus; man is tormented by a very imperious  physical desire; it spoils his rest; it is not to be denied;  the doctors will tell you; not I; how it is a physical need;  like the want of food or slumber。  In the satisfaction of  this desire; as it first appears; the soul sparingly takes  part; nay; it oft unsparingly regrets and disapproves the  satisfaction。  But let the man learn to love a woman as far  as he is capable of love; and for this random affection of  the body there is substituted a steady determination; a  consent of all his powers and faculties; which supersedes;  adopts; and commands the other。  The desire survives;  strengthened; perhaps; but taught obedience and changed in  scope and character。  Life is no longer a tale of betrayals  and regrets; for the man now lives as a whole; his  consciousness now moves on uninterrupted like a river;  through all the extremes and ups and downs of passion; he  remains approvingly conscious of himself。

Now to me; this seems a type of that rightness which the soul  demands。  It demands that we shall not live alternately with  our opposing tendencies in continual see…saw of passion and  disgust; but seek some path on which the tendencies shall no  longer oppose; but serve each other to a common end。  It  demands that we shall not pursue broken ends; but great and  comprehensive purposes; in which soul and body may unite like  notes in a harmonious chord。  That were indeed a way of peace  and pleasure; that were indeed a heaven upon earth。  It does  not demand; however; or; to speak in measure; it does not  demand of me; that I should starve my appetites for no  purpose under heaven but as a purpose in itself; or; in a  weak despair; pluck out the eye that I have not yet learned  to guide and enjoy with wisdom。  The soul demands unity of  purpose; not the dismemberment of man;
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