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Contented; unambitious people are all very well in their way。 They form a neat; useful background for great portraits to be painted against; and they make a respectable; if not particularly intelligent; audience for the active spirits of the age to play before。 I have not a word to say against contented people so long as they keep quiet。 But do not; for goodness' sake; let them go strutting about; as they are so fond of doing; crying out that they are the true models for the whole species。 Why; they are the deadheads; the drones in the great hive; the street crowds that lounge about; gaping at those who are working。
And let them not imagine; eitheras they are also fond of doingthat they are very wise and philosophical and that it is a very artful thing to be contented。 It may be true that 〃a contented mind is happy anywhere;〃 but so is a Jerusalem pony; and the consequence is that both are put anywhere and are treated anyhow。 〃Oh; you need not bother about him;〃 is what is said; 〃he is very contented as he is; and it would be a pity to disturb him。〃 And so your contented party is passed over and the discontented man gets his place。
If you are foolish enough to be contented; don't show it; but grumble with the rest; and if you can do with a little; ask for a great deal。 Because if you don't you won't get any。 In this world it is necessary to adopt the principle pursued by the plaintiff in an action for damages; and to demand ten times more than you are ready to accept。 If you can feel satisfied with a hundred; begin by insisting on a thousand; if you start by suggesting a hundred you will only get ten。
It was by not following this simple plan that poor Jean Jacques Rousseau came to such grief。 He fixed the summit of his earthly bliss at living in an orchard with an amiable woman and a cow; and he never attained even that。 He did get as far as the orchard; but the woman was not amiable; and she brought her mother with her; and there was no cow。 Now; if he had made up his mind for a large country estate; a houseful of angels; and a cattle…show; he might have lived to possess his kitchen garden and one head of live…stock; and even possibly have come across that _rara…avis_a really amiable woman。
What a terribly dull affair; too; life must be for contented people! How heavy the time must hang upon their hands; and what on earth do they occupy their thoughts with; supposing that they have any? Reading the paper and smoking seems to be the intellectual food of the majority of them; to which the more energetic add playing the flute and talking about the affairs of the next…door neighbor。
They never knew the excitement of expectation nor the stern delight of accomplished effort; such as stir the pulse of the man who has objects; and hopes; and plans。 To the ambitious man life is a brilliant gamea game that calls forth all his tact and energy and nervea game to be won; in the long run; by the quick eye and the steady hand; and yet having sufficient chance about its working out to give it all the glorious zest of uncertainty。 He exults in it as the strong swimmer in the heaving billows; as the athlete in the wrestle; the soldier in the battle。
And if he be defeated he wins the grim joy of fighting; if he lose the race; he; at least; has had a run。 Better to work and fail than to sleep one's life away。
So; walk up; walk up; walk up。 Walk up; ladies and gentlemen! walk up; boys and girls! Show your skill and try your strength; brave your luck and prove your pluck。 Walk up! The show is never closed and the game is always going。 The only genuine sport in all the fair; gentlemenhighly respectable and strictly moralpatronized by the nobility; clergy; and gentry。 Established in the year one; gentlemen; and been flourishing ever sincewalk up! Walk up; ladies and gentlemen; and take a hand。 There are prizes for all and all can play。 There is gold for the man and fame for the boy; rank for the maiden and pleasure for the fool。 So walk up; ladies and gentlemen; walk up!all prizes and no blanks; for some few win; and as to the rest; why
〃The rapture of pursuing Is the prize the vanquished gain。〃
ON THE WEATHER。
Things do go so contrary…like with me。 I wanted to hit upon an especially novel; out…of…the…way subject for one of these articles。 〃I will write one paper about something altogether new;〃 I said to myself; 〃something that nobody else has ever written or talked about before; and then I can have it all my own way。〃 And I went about for days; trying to think of something of this kind; and I couldn't。 And Mrs。 Cutting; our charwoman; came yesterdayI don't mind mentioning her name; because I know she will not see this book。 She would not look at such a frivolous publication。 She never reads anything but the Bible and _Lloyd's Weekly News_。 All other literature she considers unnecessary and sinful。
She said: 〃Lor'; sir; you do look worried。〃
I said: 〃Mrs。 Cutting; I am trying to think of a subject the discussion of which will come upon the world in the nature of a startlersome subject upon which no previous human being has ever said a wordsome subject that will attract by its novelty; invigorate by its surprising freshness。〃
She laughed and said I was a funny gentleman。
That's my luck again。 When I make serious observations people chuckle; when I attempt a joke nobody sees it。 I had a beautiful one last week。 I thought it so good; and I worked it up and brought it in artfully at a dinner…party。 I forget how exactly; but we had been talking about the attitude of Shakespeare toward the Reformation; and I said something and immediately added; 〃Ah; that reminds me; such a funny thing happened the other day in Whitechapel。〃 〃Oh;〃 said they; 〃what was that?〃 〃Oh; 'twas awfully funny;〃 I replied; beginning to giggle myself; 〃it will make you roar;〃 and I told it them。
There was dead silence when I finishedit was one of those long jokes; tooand then; at last; somebody said: 〃And that was the joke?〃
I assured them that it was; and they were very polite and took my word for it。 All but one old gentleman at the other end of the table; who wanted to know which was the jokewhat he said to her or what she said to him; and we argued it out。
Some people are too much the other way。 I knew a fellow once whose natural tendency to laugh at everything was so strong that if you wanted to talk seriously to him; you had to explain beforehand that what you were going to say would not be amusing。 Unless you got him to clearly understand this; he would go off into fits of merriment over every word you uttered。 I have known him on being asked the time stop short in the middle of the road; slap his leg; and burst into a roar of laughter。 One never dared say anything really funny to that man。 A good joke would have killed him on the spot。
In the present instance I vehemently repudiated the accusation of frivolity; and pressed Mrs。 Cutting for practical ideas。 She then became thoughtful and hazarded 〃samplers;〃 saying that she never heard them spoken much of now; but that they used to be all the rage when she was a girl。
I declined samplers and begged her to think again