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On the steps outside the rebuffed Merton Gill glanced at his own natty wrist…watch； bought with some of the later wages of his shame。 It was the luncheon hour； mechanically he made his way to the cafeteria。 He had ceased to rehearse the speech a doughtier Baird would now have been hearing。
Instead he roughly drafted one that Sarah Nevada Montague could not long evade。 Even on her dying bed she would be compelled to listen。 The practising orator with bent head mumbled as he walked。 He still mumbled as he indicated a choice of foods at the cafeteria counter； he continued to be thus absorbed as he found a table near the centre of the room。
He arranged his assortment of viands。 〃You led me on； that's what you did；〃 he continued to the absent culprit。 〃Led me on to make a laughing…stock of myself； that's what you did。 Made a fool of me； that's what you did。〃
〃All the same； I can't help thinking he's a harm to the industry；〃 came the crisp tones of Henshaw from an adjoining table。 The rehearsing orator glanced up to discover that the director and the sunny…faced brown and gray man he called Governor were smoking above the plates of their finished luncheon。
〃I wouldn't worry too much；〃 suggested the cheerful governor。
〃But see what he does： he takes the good old reliable； sure…fire stuff and makes fun of it。 I admit it's funny to start with； but what'll happen to us if the picture public ever finds that out？ What'll we do then for dramaafter they've learned to laugh at the old stuff？〃
〃Tush； tush； my boy！〃 The Governor waved a halfconsumed cigarette until its ash fell。 〃Never fear。 Do you think a thousand Jeff Bairds could make the picture public laugh at the old stuff when it's played straight？ They laughed last night； yes； but not so much at the really fine burlesque； they guffawed at the slap…stick stuff that went with it。 Baird's shrewd。 He knows if he played straight burlesque he'd never make a dollar； so notice how he'll give a bit of straight that is genuine art； then a bit of slap…stick that any one can get。 The slap…stick is what carries the show。 Real burlesque is criticism； my boy； sometimes the very high…browest sort。 It demands sophistication； a pretty high intelligence in the man that gets it。
〃All right。 Now take your picture public。 Twenty million people every day； not the same ones every day； but with same average cranial index； which is low for all but about seven out of every hundred。 That's natural because there aren't twenty million people in the world with taste or real intelligenceprobably not five million。 Well； you take this twenty million bunch that we sell to every day； and suppose they saw that lovely thing last nightdon't you know they'd all be back to…night to see a real mopping mother with a real son falsely accused of crimesure they'd be back； their heads bloody but unbowed。 Don't worry； that reliable field marshal； old General Hokum； leads an unbeatable army。〃
Merton Gill had listened to the beginning of this harangue； but now he savagely devoured food。 He thought this socalled Governor was too much like Baird。
〃Well； Governor； I hope you're right。 But that was pretty keen stuff last night。 That first bit won't do Parmalee any good； and that Buck Benson stuffyou can't tell me a little more of that wouldn't make Benson look around for a new play。〃
〃But I do tell you just that。 It won't hurt Parmalee a bit； and Benson can go on Bensoning to the end of timeto big money。 You keep forgetting this twenty…million audience。 Go out and buy a picture magazine and read it through； just to remind you。 They want hokum； and pay for it。 Even this thing of Baird's； with all the saving slapstick； is over the heads of a good half of them。 I'll make a bet with you now； anything you name； that it won't gross two thirds as much as Benson's next Western； and in that they'll cry their eyes out when he kisses his horse good…bye。 See if they don't。 Or see if they don't bawl at the next old gray…haired mother with a mop and a son that gets in bad。
〃Why； if you give 'em hokum they don't even demand acting。 Look at our own star； Mercer。 You know as well as I do that she not only can't act； but she's merely a beautiful moron。 In a world where right prevailed she'd be crowned queen of the morons without question。 She may have an idea that two and two make four； but if she has it's only because she believes everything she hears。 And look at the mail she gets。 Every last one of the twenty million has written to tell her what a noble actress she is。 She even believes that。
〃Baird can keep on with the burlesque stuff； but his little old two… reelers'll probably have to pay for it； especially if he keeps those high…priced people。 I'll bet that one new man of his sets him back seven hundred and fifty a week。 The Lord knows he's worth every cent of it。 My boy； tell me； did you ever in all your life see a lovelier imitation of a perfectly rotten actor？ There's an artist for you。 Who is he； anyway？ Where'd he come from？〃 Merton Gill again listened； he was merely affecting to busy himself with a fork。 It was good acting。
〃I don't know；〃 replied Henshaw。 〃Some of the crowd last night said he was just an extra that Baird dug up on the lot here。 And； on the subject of burlesque； they also said Baird was having him do some Edgar Wayne stuff in a new one。〃
〃Fine！〃 The Governor beamed。 〃Can't you see him as the honest； likable country boy？ I bet he'll be good to his old mother in this one； too； and get the best of the city slickers in the end。 For heaven's sake don't let me miss it！ This kid last night handed me laughs that were better than a month's vacation for this old carcass of mine。 You say he was just an extra？〃
〃That's what I heard last night。 Anyway； he's all you say he is as an artist。 Where do you suppose he got it？ Do you suppose he's just the casual genius that comes along from time to time？ And why didn't he stay 'straight' instead of playing horse with the sacred traditions of our art？ That's what troubled me as I watched him。 Even in that wild business with the spurs he was the artist every second。 He must have tricked those falls but I couldn't catch him at it。 Why should such a man tie up with Baird？〃
〃Ask me something hard。 I'd say this bird had been tried out in serious stuff and couldn't make the grade。 That's the way he struck me。 Probably he once thought he could play Hamletone of those boys。 Didn't you get the real pathos he'd turn on now and then？ He actually had me kind of teary a couple of times。 But I could see he'd also make me laugh my head off any time he showed in a straight piece。
〃To begin with； look at that low…comedy face of his。 And then something peculiareven while he's imitating a bad actor you feel somehow that it isn't all imitation。 It's art； I grant you； but you feel he'd still be a bad actor if he'd try to imitate a good one。 Somehow he found out his limits and decided to be what God meant him to be。 Does that answer you？ It gives you acting…plus； and if that isn't the plus in this case I miss my guess。〃
〃I suppose you're rightsomething like that。 And of course the real pathos is there。 It has to be。 There never was a great comedian without it； and thi