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don quixote(堂·吉珂德)-第87章

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good name was more to him than his own。 He said; and justly; that a
married man upon whom heaven had bestowed a beautiful wife should
consider as carefully what friends he brought to his house as what
female friends his wife associated with; for what cannot be done or
arranged in the market…place; in church; at public festivals or at
stations (opportunities that husbands cannot always deny their wives);
may be easily managed in the house of the female friend or relative in
whom most confidence is reposed。 Lothario said; too; that every
married man should have some friend who would point out to him any
negligence he might be guilty of in his conduct; for it will sometimes
happen that owing to the deep affection the husband bears his wife
either he does not caution her; or; not to vex her; refrains from
telling her to do or not to do certain things; doing or avoiding which
may be a matter of honour or reproach to him; and errors of this
kind he could easily correct if warned by a friend。 But where is
such a friend to be found as Lothario would have; so judicious; so
loyal; and so true?
  Of a truth I know not; Lothario alone was such a one; for with the
utmost care and vigilance he watched over the honour of his friend;
and strove to diminish; cut down; and reduce the number of days for
going to his house according to their agreement; lest the visits of
a young man; wealthy; high…born; and with the attractions he was
conscious of possessing; at the house of a woman so beautiful as
Camilla; should be regarded with suspicion by the inquisitive and
malicious eyes of the idle public。 For though his integrity and
reputation might bridle slanderous tongues; still he was unwilling
to hazard either his own good name or that of his friend; and for this
reason most of the days agreed upon he devoted to some other
business which he pretended was unavoidable; so that a great portion
of the day was taken up with complaints on one side and excuses on the
other。 It happened; however; that on one occasion when the two were
strolling together outside the city; Anselmo addressed the following
words to Lothario。
  〃Thou mayest suppose; Lothario my friend; that I am unable to give
sufficient thanks for the favours God has rendered me in making me the
son of such parents as mine were; and bestowing upon me with no
niggard hand what are called the gifts of nature as well as those of
fortune; and above all for what he has done in giving me thee for a
friend and Camilla for a wife… two treasures that I value; if not as
highly as I ought; at least as highly as I am able。 And yet; with
all these good things; which are commonly all that men need to
enable them to live happily; I am the most discontented and
dissatisfied man in the whole world; for; I know not how long since; I
have been harassed and oppressed by a desire so strange and so
unusual; that I wonder at myself and blame and chide myself when I
am alone; and strive to stifle it and hide it from my own thoughts;
and with no better success than if I were endeavouring deliberately to
publish it to all the world; and as; in short; it must come out; I
would confide it to thy safe keeping; feeling sure that by this means;
and by thy readiness as a true friend to afford me relief; I shall
soon find myself freed from the distress it causes me; and that thy
care will give me happiness in the same degree as my own folly has
caused me misery。〃
  The words of Anselmo struck Lothario with astonishment; unable as he
was to conjecture the purport of such a lengthy preamble; and though
be strove to imagine what desire it could be that so troubled his
friend; his conjectures were all far from the truth; and to relieve
the anxiety which this perplexity was causing him; he told him he
was doing a flagrant injustice to their great friendship in seeking
circuitous methods of confiding to him his most hidden thoughts; for
be well knew he might reckon upon his counsel in diverting them; or
his help in carrying them into effect。
  〃That is the truth;〃 replied Anselmo; 〃and relying upon that I
will tell thee; friend Lothario; that the desire which harasses me
is that of knowing whether my wife Camilla is as good and as perfect
as I think her to be; and I cannot satisfy myself of the truth on this
point except by testing her in such a way that the trial may prove the
purity of her virtue as the fire proves that of gold; because I am
persuaded; my friend; that a woman is virtuous only in proportion as
she is or is not tempted; and that she alone is strong who does not
yield to the promises; gifts; tears; and importunities of earnest
lovers; for what thanks does a woman deserve for being good if no
one urges her to be bad; and what wonder is it that she is reserved
and circumspect to whom no opportunity is given of going wrong and who
knows she has a husband that will take her life the first time he
detects her in an impropriety? I do not therefore hold her who is
virtuous through fear or want of opportunity in the same estimation as
her who comes out of temptation and trial with a crown of victory; and
so; for these reasons and many others that I could give thee to
justify and support the opinion I hold; I am desirous that my wife
Camilla should pass this crisis; and be refined and tested by the fire
of finding herself wooed and by one worthy to set his affections
upon her; and if she comes out; as I know she will; victorious from
this struggle; I shall look upon my good fortune as unequalled; I
shall be able to say that the cup of my desire is full; and that the
virtuous woman of whom the sage says 'Who shall find her?' has
fallen to my lot。 And if the result be the contrary of what I
expect; in the satisfaction of knowing that I have been right in my
opinion; I shall bear without complaint the pain which my so dearly
bought experience will naturally cause me。 And; as nothing of all thou
wilt urge in opposition to my wish will avail to keep me from carrying
it into effect; it is my desire; friend Lothario; that thou shouldst
consent to become the instrument for effecting this purpose that I
am bent upon; for I will afford thee opportunities to that end; and
nothing shall be wanting that I may think necessary for the pursuit of
a virtuous; honourable; modest and high…minded woman。 And among
other reasons; I am induced to entrust this arduous task to thee by
the consideration that if Camilla be conquered by thee the conquest
will not be pushed to extremes; but only far enough to account that
accomplished which from a sense of honour will be left undone; thus
I shall not be wronged in anything more than intention; and my wrong
will remain buried in the integrity of thy silence; which I know
well will be as lasting as that of death in what concerns me。 If;
therefore; thou wouldst have me enjoy what can be called life; thou
wilt at once engage in this love struggle; not lukewarmly nor
slothfully; but with the energy and zeal that my desire demands; and
with the loyalty our friendship assures me of。〃
  Such were the words Anselmo addressed to Lothario; who listened to
them with such attention that; except to say what has bee
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