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little； but assumed his usual gruffness。 〃I can't bear sick people；〃
he said。
〃It has always seemed to me；〃 said Meta； 〃that few lives could come
up to Dr。 May's。 Think of going about； always watched for with hope；
often bringing gladness and relief； if nothing else； comfort and
kindness； his whole business doing good。〃
〃One is paid for it；〃 said Tom。
〃Nothing could ever repay Dr。 May；〃 said Meta。 〃Can any one feel the
fee anything but a mere form？ Besides； think of the numbers and
numbers that he takes nothing from； and oh！ to how many he has
brought the most real good； when they would have shut their doors
against it in any other form！ Oh； Tom； I think none of you guess how
every one feels about your father。 I recollect one poor woman
saying； after he had attended her brother； 'He could not save his
body； but； surely； ma'am； I think he was the saving of his soul。'〃
〃It is of no use to talk of my being like my father；〃 said Tom。
Meta thought perhaps not； but she was full of admiration of his
generosity； and said； 〃You will make it the same work of love； and
charity is the true glory。〃
Any inroad on Tom's reserved and depressed nature was a benefit； and
he was of an age to be susceptible of the sympathy of one so pretty
and so engaging。 He had never been so much gratified or encouraged；
and； wishing to prolong the tete…a…tete； he chose to take the short
cut through the fir…plantations； unfrequented on account of the
perpendicular； spiked railings that divided it from the lane。
Meta was humming…bird enough to be undismayed。 She put hand and foot
wherever he desired； flattered him by letting him handily help her
up； and bounded light as a feather down on the other side；
congratulating herself on the change from the dusty lane to the
whispering pine woods； between which wound the dark path； bestrewn
with brown slippery needle…leaves； and edged with the delicate
feathering ling and tufts of soft grass。
Tom had miscalculated the chances of interruption。 Meta was
lingering to track the royal highway of some giant ants to their fir…
leaf hillock； when they were hailed from behind； and her squire felt
ferocious at the sight of Norman and Harry closing the perspective of
fir…trunks。
〃Hallo！ Tom； what a guide you are！〃 exclaimed Norman。 〃That fence
which even Ethel and Mary avoid！〃
〃Mary climbs like a cow； and Ethel like a father…long…legs；〃 said
Tom。 〃Now Meta flies like a bird。〃
〃And Tom helped me so cleverly；〃 said Meta。 〃It was an excellent
move； to get into the shade and this delicious pine tree fragrance。〃
〃Halt！〃 said Norman〃this is too fast for Meta。〃
〃I cannot；〃 said Harry。 〃I must get there in time to set Dr。
Spencer's tackle to rights。 He is tolerably knowing about knots； but
there is a dodge beyond him。 Come on； Tom。〃
He drew on the reluctant Etonian； who looked repiningly back at the
increasing distance between him and the other pair； till a turn in
the path cut off his view。
〃I am afraid you do not know what you have undertaken；〃 said Norman。
〃I am a capital walker。 And I know； or do not know； how often Ethel
takes the same walk。〃
〃Ethel is no rule。〃
〃She ought to be；〃 said Meta。 〃To be like her has always been my
ambition。〃
〃Circumstances have formed Ethel。〃
〃Circumstances！ What an ambiguous word！ Either Providence pointing
to duty； or the world drawing us from it。〃
〃Stepping…stones； or stumbling…blocks。〃
〃And； oh！ the difficult question； when to bend them； or to bend to
them！〃
〃There must be always some guiding；〃 said Norman。
〃I believe there is；〃 said Meta； 〃but when trumpet…peals are ringing
around； it is hard to know whether one is really 'waiting beside the
tent；' or only dawdling。〃
〃It is great self…denial in the immovable square not to join the
charge；〃 said Norman。
〃Yes； but they； being shot at； are not deceiving themselves。〃
〃I suppose self…deception on those points is very common。〃
〃Especially among young ladies；〃 said Meta。 〃I hear so much of what
girls would do； if they might； or could； that I long to see them like
Etheldo what they can。 And then it strikes me that I am doing the
same； living wilfully in indulgence； and putting my trust in my own
misgivings and discontent。〃
〃I should have thought that discontent had as little to do with you
as with any living creature。〃
〃You don't know how I could growl！〃 said Meta； laughing。 〃Though
less from having anything to complain of； than from having nothing to
complain of。〃
〃You mean；〃 he said； pausing； with a seriousness and hesitation that
startled her〃do you mean that this is not the course of life that
you would choose？〃
A sort of bashfulness made her put her answer playfully
〃All play and no work makes Jack a mere toy。
〃Toys have a kindly mission； and I may be good for nothing else； but
I would have rather been a coffee…pot than a china shepherdess。〃
The gaiety disconcerted him； and he seemed to try to be silent； or to
reply in the same tone； but he could not help returning to the
subject。 〃Then you find no charm in the refinements to which you
have been brought up？〃
〃Only too much；〃 said Meta。
He was silent； and fearing to have added to his fine…lady impression；
she resumed。 〃I mean that I never could dislike anything； and
kindness gives these things a soul； but； of course； I should be
better satisfied； if I lived harder； and had work to do。〃
〃Meta！〃 he exclaimed； 〃you tempt me very much！ Would you？ No； it
is too unreasonable。 Would you shareshare the work that I have
undertaken？〃
He turned aside and leaned against a tree； as if not daring to watch
the effect of the agitated words that had broken from him。 She had
little imagined whither his last sayings had been tending； and stood
still； breathless with the surprise。
〃Forgive me；〃 he said hastily。 〃It was very wrong。 I never meant to
have vexed you by the betrayal of my vain affection。〃
He seemed to be going； and this roused her。 〃Stay； Norman；〃
exclaimed she。 〃Why should it vex me？ I should like it very much
indeed。〃
He faced suddenly towards her 〃Meta； Meta！ is it possible？ Do you
know what you are saying？〃
〃I think I do。〃
〃You must understand me；〃 said Norman； striving to speak calmly。 〃You
have beenwords will not express what you have been to me for years
past； but I thought you too far beyond my hopes。 I knew I ought to
be removed from youI believed that those who are debarred from
earthly happiness are marked for especial tasks。 I never intended
you to know what actuated me； and now the work is undertaken； and
and I cannot turn back；〃 he added quickly； as if fearing himself。
〃No indeed；〃 was her steady reply。
〃Then I may believe it！〃 cried Norman。 〃You doyou willyou
deliberately choose to share it with me？〃
〃I will try not to be a weight on you；〃 answered the young girl； with
a sweet mixture of resolution and humility。 〃It would be the
greatest possible privilege。 I really do not think I am a fine lady
ingrain； and you will teach me not to be too unworthy。〃
〃I？ Oh； Meta； you know not what I am！ Yet with you； with you to
inspire； to streng