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entertaining himself with a book。
He was dressing； as it seemed； by easy stages； and having
performed half the journey was taking a long rest。 Completely
attired as to his legs and feet in the trimmest fashion of the day； he
had yet the remainder of his toilet to perform。 The coat was
stretched； like a refined scarecrow； on its separate horse； the
waistcoat was displayed to the best advantage； the various
ornamental articles of dress were severally set out in most alluring
order； and yet he lay dangling his legs between the sofa and the
ground； as intent upon his book as if there were nothing but bed
before him。
‘Upon my honour；’ he said； at length raising his eyes to the
ceiling with the air of a man who was reflecting seriously on what
he had read； ‘upon my honour； the most masterly composition； the
most delicate thoughts； the finest code of morality； and the most
gentlemanly sentiments in the universe！ Ah Ned； Ned； if you
would but form your mind by such precepts； we should have but
one common feeling on every subject that could possibly arise
between us！’
This apostrophe was addressed； like the rest of his remarks； to
empty air： for Edward was not present； and the father was quite
alone。
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‘My Lord Chesterfield；’ he said； pressing his hand tenderly
upon the book as he laid it down； ‘if I could but have profited by
your genius soon enough to have formed my son on the model you
have left to all wise fathers； both he and I would have been rich
men。 Shakespeare was undoubtedly very fine in his way； Milton
good； though prosy； Lord Bacon deep； and decidedly knowing； but
the writer who should be his country’s pride； is my Lord
Chesterfield。’
He became thoughtful again； and the toothpick was in
requisition。
‘I thought I was tolerably accomplished as a man of the world；’
he continued； ‘I flattered myself that I was pretty well versed in all
those little arts and graces which distinguish men of the world
from boors and peasants； and separate their character from those
intensely vulgar sentiments which are called the national
character。 Apart from any natural prepossession in my own
favour； I believed I was。 Still； in every page of this enlightened
writer； I find some captivating hypocrisy which has never
occurred to me before； or some superlative piece of selfishness to
which I was utterly a stranger。 I should quite blush for myself
before this stupendous creature； if remembering his precepts； one
might blush at anything。 An amazing man！ a nobleman indeed！
any King or Queen may make a Lord； but only the Devil himself—
and the Graces—can make a Chesterfield。’
Men who are thoroughly false and hollow； seldom try to hide
those vices from themselves； and yet in the very act of avowing
them； they lay claim to the virtues they feign most to despise。 ‘For；’
say they； ‘this is honesty； this is truth。 All mankind are like us； but
they have not the candour to avow it。’ The more they affect to
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deny the existence of any sincerity in the world； the more they
would be thought to possess it in its boldest shape； and this is an
unconscious compliment to Truth on the part of these
philosophers； which will turn the laugh against them to the Day of
Judgment。
Mr Chester； having extolled his favourite author； as above
recited； took up the book again in the excess of his admiration and
was composing himself for a further perusal of its sublime
morality； when he was disturbed by a noise at the outer door；
occasioned as it seemed by the endeavours of his servant to
obstruct the entrance of some unwelcome visitor。
‘A late hour for an importunate creditor；’ he said； raising his
eyebrows with as indolent an expression of wonder as if the noise
were in the street； and one with which he had not the smallest
possible concern。 ‘Much after their accustomed time。 The usual
pretence I suppose。 No doubt a heavy payment to make up
tomorrow。 Poor fellow； he loses time； and time is money as the
good proverb says—I never found it out though。 Well。 What now？
You know I am not at home。’
‘A man； sir；’ replied the servant； who was to the full as cool and
negligent in his way as his master； ‘has brought home the riding…
whip you lost the other day。 I told him you were out； but he said he
was to wait while I brought it in； and wouldn’t go till I did。’
‘He was quite right；’ returned his master； ‘and you’re a
blockhead； possessing no judgment or discretion whatever。 Tell
him to come in； and see that he rubs his shoes for exactly five
minutes first。’
The man laid the whip on a chair； and withdrew。 The master；
who had only heard his foot upon the ground and had not taken
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the trouble to turn round and look at him； shut his book； and
pursued the train of ideas his entrance had disturbed。
‘If time were money；’ he said； handling his snuff…box； ‘I would
compound with my creditors； and give them—let me see—how
much a day？ There’s my nap after dinner—an hour—they’re
extremely welcome to that； and to make the most of it。 In the
morning； between my breakfast and the paper； I could spare them
another hour； in the evening before dinner say another。 Three
hours a day。 They might pay themselves in calls； with interest； in
twelve month