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TALES FROM TWO HEMISPHERES。
Ralph stood in the little low…ceiled parlor； as she imagined； to bid her
good…bye。 They had been speaking of her father； her brothers； and the
farm； and she had expressed the wish that if he ever should come to that
part of the country he might pay them a visit。 Her words had kindled a
vague hope in his breast； but in their very frankness and friendly regard
there was something which slew the hope they had begotten。 He held her
hand in his； and her large confiding eyes shone with an emotion which
was beautiful； but was yet not love。
〃If you were but a peasant born like myself；〃 said she； in a voice which
sounded almost tender； 〃then I should like to talk to you as I would to my
own brother； but〃
〃No； not brother； Bertha；〃 cried he； with sudden vehemence； 〃I love
you better than I ever loved any earthly being； and if you knew how firmly
this love has clutched at the roots of my heart； you would perhapsyou
would at least not look so reproachfully at me。〃
She dropped his hand； and stood for a moment silent。
〃I am sorry that it should have come to this； Mr。 Grim；〃 said she；
visibly struggling for calmness。 〃And I am perhaps more to blame than
you。〃
〃Blame；〃 muttered he； 〃why are you to blame？〃
〃Because I do not love you； although I sometimes feared that this
might come。 But then again I persuaded myself that it could not be so。〃
He took a step toward the door； laid his hand on the knob； and gazed
down before him。
〃Bertha；〃 began he； slowly； raising his head； 〃you have always
disapproved of me； you have despised me in your heart； but you thought
you would be doing a good work if you succeeded in making a man of
me。〃
〃You use strong language；〃 answered she； hesitatingly； 〃but there is
truth in what you say。〃
Again there was a long pause； in which the ticking of the old parlor
clock grew louder and louder。
〃Then；〃 he broke out at last； 〃tell me before we part if I can do nothing
to gainI will not say your lovebut only your regard？ What would you
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TALES FROM TWO HEMISPHERES。
do if you were in my place？〃
〃My advice you will hardly heed； and I do not even know that it would
be well if you did。 But if I were a man in your position； I should break
with my whole past； start out into the world where nobody knew me； and
where I should be dependent only upon my own strength； and there I
would conquer a place for myself； if it were only for the satisfaction of
knowing that I was really a man。 Here cushions are sewed under your
arms； a hundred invisible threads bind you to a life of idleness and vanity；
everybody is ready to carry you on his hands； the road is smoothed for you；
every stone carefully moved out of your path； and you will probably go to
your grave without having ever harbored one earnest thought； without
having done one manly deed。〃
Ralph stood transfixed； gazing at her with open mouth； he felt a kind
of stupid fright； as if some one had suddenly seized him by the shoulders
and shaken him violently。 He tried vainly to remove his eyes from
Bertha。 She held him as by a powerful spell。 He saw that her face was
lighted with an altogether new beauty； he noticed the deep glow upon her
cheek； the brilliancy of her eye； the slight quiver of her lip。 But he saw
all this as one sees things in a half…trance； without attempting to account
for them； the door between his soul and his senses was closed。
〃I know that I have been bold in speaking to you in this way；〃 she said
at last； seating herself in a chair at the window。 〃But it was yourself who
asked me。 And I have felt all the time that I should have to tell you this
before we parted。〃
〃And；〃 answered he； making a strong effort to appear calm； 〃if I
follow your advice； will you allow me to see you once more before you
go？〃
〃I shall remain here another week； and shall； during that time； always
be ready to receive you。〃
〃Thank you。 Good…bye。〃
〃Good…bye。〃
Ralph carefully avoided all the fashionable thoroughfares； he felt
degraded before himself； and he had an idea that every man could read his
humiliation in his countenance。 Now he walked on quickly； striking the
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TALES FROM TWO HEMISPHERES。
sidewalk with his heels； now； again； he fell into an uneasy； reckless
saunter； according as the changing moods inspired defiance of his sentence；
or a qualified surrender。 And； as he walked on； the bitterness grew within
him； and he pitilessly reviled himself for having allowed himself to be
made a fool of by 〃that little country goose；〃 when he was well aware that
there were hundreds of women of the best families of the land who would
feel honored at receiving his attentions。 But this sort of reasoning he
knew to he both weak and contemptible； and his better self soon rose in
loud rebellion。
〃After all；〃 he muttered； 〃in the main thing she was right。 I am a
miserable good…for… nothing； a hot…house plant； a poor stick； and if I were
a woman myself； I don't think I should waste my affections on a man of
that calibre。〃
Then he unconsciously fell to analyzing Bertha's character； wondering
vaguely that a person who moved so timidly in social life； appearing so
diffident； from an ever…present fear of blundering against the established
forms of etiquette； could judge so quickly； and with such a merciless
certainty； whenever a moral question； a question of right and wrong； was
at issue。 And； pursuing the same train of thought； he contrasted her with
himself； who moved in the highest spheres of society as in his native
element； heedless of moral scruples； and conscious of no loftier motive for
his actions than the immediate pleasure of the moment。 As Ralph turned
the corner of a street； he heard himself hailed from the other sidewalk by a
chorus of merry voices。
〃Ah； my dear Baroness；〃 cried a young man； springing across the
street and grasping Ralph's hand （all his student friends cal