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Meekness and mildness； and softness； and gentleness； and tenderness； and
humility； and obedience to her husband； and faith in her confessor； and
domesticity； or； as learned doctors call it； the faculty of
stayathomeitiveness； and embroidery； and music； and pickling； and
preserving； and the whole complex and multiplex detail of the noble
science of dinner； as well in preparation for the table； as in arrangement
over it； and in distribution around it to knights； and squires； and ghostly
friars；these are female virtues： but valourwhy who ever heard？〃
〃She is the all in all；〃 said brother Michael； 〃gentle as a ring…dove； yet
high…soaring as a falcon： humble below her deserving； yet deserving
beyond the estimate of panegyric： an exact economist in all superfluity；
yet a most bountiful dispenser in all liberality： the chief regulator of her
household； the fairest pillar of her hall； and the sweetest blossom of her
bower： having； in all opposite proposings； sense to understand； judgment
to weigh； discretion to choose； firmness to undertake； diligence to conduct；
perseverance to accomplish； and resolution to maintain。 For obedience to
her husband； that is not to be tried till she has one： for faith in her
confessor； she has as much as the law prescribes： for embroidery an
Arachne： for music a Siren： and for pickling and preserving； did not
one of her jars of sugared apricots give you your last surfeit at Arlingford
Castle？〃
〃Call you that preserving？〃 said the little friar； 〃I call it destroying。
Call you it pickling？ Truly it pickled me。 My life was saved by
miracle。〃
〃By canary；〃 said brother Michael。 〃Canary is the only life preserver；
the true aurum potabile； the universal panacea for all diseases； thirst； and
short life。 Your life was saved by canary。〃
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〃Indeed； reverend father；〃 said Sir Ralph； 〃if the young lady be half
what you describe； she must be a paragon： but your commending her for
valour does somewhat amaze me。〃
〃She can fence；〃 said the little friar； 〃and draw the long bow； and play
at singlestick and quarter…staff。〃
〃Yet mark you；〃 said brother Michael； 〃not like a virago or a hoyden；
or one that would crack a serving…man's head for spilling gravy on her ruff；
but with such womanly grace and temperate self…command as if those
manly exercises belonged to her only； and were become for her sake
feminine。〃
〃You incite me；〃 said Sir Ralph； 〃to view her more nearly。 That
madcap earl found me other employment than to remark her in the
chapel。〃
〃The earl is a worthy peer；〃 said brother Michael； 〃he is worth any
fourteen earls on this side Trent； and any seven on the other。〃 （The reader
will please to remember that Rubygill Abbey was north of Trent。）
〃His mettle will be tried；〃 said Sir Ralph。 〃There is many a courtier
will swear to King Henry to bring him in dead or alive。〃
〃They must look to the brambles then；〃 said brother Michael。
〃The bramble； the bramble； the bonny forest bramble； Doth
make a jest Of silken vest； That will through greenwood scramble：
The bramble； the bramble； the bonny forest bramble。〃
〃Plague on your lungs； son Michael；〃 said the abbot； 〃this is your old
coil： always roaring in your cups。〃
〃I know what I say；〃 said brother Michael； 〃there is often more sense
in an old song than in a new homily。
The courtly pad doth amble； When his gay lord would ramble：
But both may catch An awkward scratch； If they ride among the
bramble： The bramble； the bramble； the bonny forest bramble。〃
〃Tall friar；〃 said Sir Ralph； 〃either you shoot the shafts of your
merriment at random； or you know more of the earl's designs than
beseems your frock。〃
〃Let my frock；〃 said brother Michael； 〃answer for its own sins。 It is
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worn past covering mine。 It is too weak for a shield； too transparent for a
screen； too thin for a shelter； too light for gravity； and too threadbare for a
jest。 The wearer would be naught indeed who should misbeseem such a
wedding garment。
But wherefore does the sheep wear wool？ That he in season
sheared may be； And the shepherd be warm though his flock be cool：
So I'll have a new cloak about me。〃
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CHAPTER II
Vray moyne si oncques en feut depuis que le monde moynant moyna
de moynerie。RABELAIS。
The Earl of Huntingdon； living in the vicinity of a royal forest； and
passionately attached to the chase from his infancy； had long made as free
with the king's deer as Lord Percy proposed to do with those of Lord
Douglas in the memorable hunting of Cheviot。 It is sufficiently well
known how severe were the forest…laws in those days； and with what
jealousy the kings of England maintained this branch of their prerogative；
but menaces and remonstrances were thrown away on the earl； who
declared that he would not thank Saint Peter for admission into Paradise； if
he were obliged to leave his bow and hounds at the gate。 King Henry
（the Second） swore by Saint Botolph to make him rue his sport； and；
having caused him to be duly and formally accused； summoned him to
London to answer the charge。 The earl； deeming himself safer among his
own vassals than among king Henry's courtiers； took no notice of the
mandate。 King Henry sent a force to bring him； vi et armis； to court。 The
earl made a resolute resistance； and put the king's force to flight under a
shower of arrows： an act which the courtiers declared to be treason。 At
the same time； the abbot of Doncaster sued up the payment of certain
moneys； which the earl； whose revenue ran a